Benjamin Franklin once said that “nothing can be certain but death and taxes”.  Oh dear Ben, how I beg to differ. Far from being certainties sometimes we don’t even know the chronology of the two.

To say it’s been an eventful week in Scottish football would be a massive understatement; like saying Adriano is partial to crisps. On Monday the big news was that Rangers were to be placed into administration. By Friday afternoon the tale included porn stars, politicians, pundits, a tax bill between seven and eighty million pounds, assorted finger-pointing, a ten-point deduction for the reigning champions and mass frustration from Scottish journalists at the loading times, searchability and general awkwardness of PDF documents.

I’d suggest that “you couldn’t make it up”, but you could. It’s just that nobody would be likely to believe you.

It was easy to forget that buried deep amongst the Dadaism were some games of football, but even they were touched by the bizarre. Ever the houseguest of the surreal, Kenny Shiels added to the general theme of the week by comparing Ally McCoist to Jesus Christ in his pre-match press conference. Stop. Now read that sentence back again just to make sure that sunk in. Got it? Onwards…

Kilmarnock were faced with a Rangers team that may have been low on numbers but were anything but when it came to backing. The largest crowd in the whole UK had turned up at Ibrox to show solidarity with the embattled club.

Kilmarnock had other ideas as Shiels the father and Shiels the son defeated the offspring of The Big Man for the second time this season.

Dean Shiels got the only goal of the game, but there were healthy doses of incident elsewhere. David Healy was ruled offside by the narrowest of margins as he put the ball in the net, and Sasa Papac was sent off the sort of challenge that didn’t raise an eyebrow fifteen years ago but is always a red card now. You know the sort; the ones former players lament over their loss while also ruing the fact they would have liked to have had longer careers.

Such blasphemy made an already intriguing game at Fir Park that little bit more curious. Motherwell and Hearts were separated by six points, and seemed to be battling each other for third place. With Rangers’ total reduced by ten and a question mark remaining over their eligibility for European competition next season, Motherwell and Hearts had the added incentive of the possibility of Champions League football next season.

The possibility of elimination by Teuta Durres or Flora Tallinn, right enough, but Big Time chances nonetheless.

Despite Hearts having the early pressure Motherwell took the lead after an Andy Webster own goal and didn’t look back. Jamie Murphy added a second before Keith Lasley was sent off for two fouls on Ian Black, who cruelly robbed fans of a Scottish version of Mean Machine by being cleared in his trial this week. But the Law punished Hearts in other ways (cringe) as Motherwell midfielder Nicky made sure of the victory.

There were games between Aberdeen and St Johnstone, and Dundee United and St Mirren this weekend. Both matches finished goalless and quite frankly it would be paying massive amounts of undeserved credit to either game if we ever said anything more about them. So there.

There was marginally more excitement in Dunfermline as the Pars failed to win at home at the 13th time of asking. Inverness were the visitors and despite appearing far more confident than their hosts, they fell behind when a Big Mad Mental Martin Hardie free-kick hit the bar and fell to Joe Cardle.

Despite Inverness looking to their saviour in each of the last meetings – Pars goalkeeper Chris Smith – it was the home side that posed more of a threat in the second half. But with Dunfermline’s defence this season being as solid as a ghost made out of ideas, there was a certain inevitability to Nick Ross’s equaliser.

Fortunately for Dunfermline, Hibernian were again in a particularly charitable mood against a Celtic team that were anything but. Not only did Pat Fenlon’s side fail to pick up any points, they obligingly deflated their goal difference by the odd goal in five.

That should take little away from Celtic, who seem to be taking Ally McCoist’s suggestion that “the league isn’t over” a little more seriously than anyone else. Anthony Stokes always scores against his old club and gave Celtic the lead after 15 minutes. Gary Hooper doubled that five minutes later. A Charlie Mulgrew free-kick, a Ki Sung Yeung deflection and a second from Hooper ensured it was a comfortable victory for number 15 in a row.

The question is when rather than if this one is going to be concluded, as Celtic have turned a twelve point deficit into a seventeen point lead in a couple of months. Whisper it, but the decider could theoretically be the game at Ibrox…

Someone needs to add to Ben Franklin’s list of certainties.

In brief

•    Celtic (68) lead Rangers (51) by 17 points following the latter’s administration. There’s the same points difference between bottom and fourth as there is between top and second.
•    Motherwell (45) are creeping up behind Rangers, and will worry them further if they win their game in hand.
•    Hearts and St Johnstone (both 36) are holding on to their places in the top six, but neither they nor the chasing pack – Kilmarnock (32), Dundee United (31), Aberdeen (31), St Mirren (29) – seem to really want to cement their place in the top half.
•    Inverness are tenth (27) with Dunfermline and Hibernian (19 each) at the foot of the table. The Hibees do have a game in hand though.